Sigh.

I am so out of steam with this whole NCAA COI and Sanctions and injustice and bullshit. I mean, really. I know as a governing body they do not have to consider precedence, but HOLY MOTHER OF GOD WHAT THE FUCK?

In a move that should be predictable by now, but nevertheless shocked many, the NCAA handed out sanctions to Ohio State that fell far short of what they did to USC despite Ohio State’s infractions being worse, more egregious and there being direct proof the head coach knew about it, willingly played ineligible players and then repeatedly lied about it to the NCAA.

The NCAA is not a universe that ever makes sense, I’ve learned this from experience.

Two years ago, based on tenuous and circumstantial evidence provided by an ex-felon with an axe to grind and no ties to the USC football program, the NCAA issued sanctions just shy of the infamous Death Penalty to USC.  The University of Southern California football program was slapped with a 2 year bowl ban, a loss of 30 scholarships over 3 years, 4 years probation, vacating of wins, trophies and championships, etc.

Oh, and they also slapped that ugly “Lack of Institutional Control” label on Troy.

Curiously, Ohio State didn’t get the lack of institutional control badge of dishonor despite appearing to be a role model for it.

Consider if you will, the fact that Ohio State’s transgressions, by any reasonable measure, were worse than USC’s, ran deeper, involved more deceit and included more than the one player responsible for taking down the men of Troy.  Ohio State’s infractions started back in 2008 and involved 14 players the NCAA found to have accepted more than $16,000 in extra benefits.

USC was told they “should have known,” when Reggie Bush was driving a “flashy, tricked out” Chevy Malibu – by the way, since when is that a flashy car (ESPECIALLY at USC) and “should have known” what kind of home his parents were living in 130 miles away from campus.

Over at Ohio State, on the other hand, some reports claim Terrelle Pryor swapped out cars more often than he changed his underwear, but not only did no one apparently notice or care,  but also Ohio State was not told they “should have known.”

INTERESTING.

Former Ohio State Head Coach and Sweater Vest Enthusiast Jim Tressel knew exactly what was going on and kept not just the Buckeye AD, but also the NCAA in the dark about the violations for nine months.

Why?

Well, because we can only assume that Tressel knew exposing his star QB and other players would render them ineligible. By keeping it to himself they were allowed to play for the entire 2010 season even though they were, in retrospect, they ended up vacating those 2010 games in which ineligible players played.

To add to the controversies in Columbus, over the summer it was found that nine players had taken cash from or been overpaid by an Ohio State University Booster  in their summer jobs.

Ohio State’s sanctions, for the record:

• 1 year bowl ban

• 9 scholarships lost over 3 years

• 5 year show-cause penalty for Jim Tressel

WHAT?!

If USC and their sanctions had never happened or were less than what was meted out to tOSU, I’d say these sanctions were nearly fair. Personally, I think the Buckeye football program should have gotten docked 5 scholarships per year but otherwise, fine.

However in what fucking universe does USC getting slapped the way we (yes WE) did and Ohio State getting off SO LIGHTLY even make the slightest bit of sense?

USC – one player and his parents 130 miles away with a wannabe agent with no ties to the USC football program

What can I say that hasn’t already been said?

MATT BARKLEY IS COMING BACK TO USC FOR HIS SENIOR SEASON.

And just like that, the NCAA COI can go fuck themselves. 2012 will be OUR YEAR. Barkley for Heisman and a team returning 20/24 starters and 77% of their total offense from a 10-2, top five team this season.

The NCAA tried to break us and failed.  Sure, there are likely to be leaner years ahead as scholarship reductions thin our ranks, but first, we have 2012 and a roster of extremely talented student athletes returning to play their hearts out – to play for what they’ve been denied the past two years — it will be a special and magical season.

With TJ McDonald announcing on Wednesday that he’s returning and Matt Barkley making his One More Year official today, I think the drink of choice for all USC Fans in 2012 needs to be a 7 & 7 to honor these two athletes and their contributions to the Trojan legacy.

This is the last time I am going to address USC’s NCAA Sanctions at length. I don’t even want to do it now, but there seems to be a rabid pack of asshole football fans from other schools that have re-emerged from the woodwork as if this is hot news.

It happened in 2004-2005 folks. The Sanctions were handed down, appealed and settled on (re: appeal denied) in June 2010.  USC has served out its two year post-season ban. It is a thing of the past.

But here’s the thing – It seems people are pissed off that USC went 10-2 and largely steamrolled through their November schedule like the proverbial Trojan horse.  It doesn’t sit well with these people that USC is doing well.  And that is pure sour grapes. That’s jealousy. That’s you hating USC because you aren’t USC. That’s not OUR problem, it’s YOURS.

Seriously, you would not believe the arguments I’ve gotten in because someone spewed vitriol in my direction.  Most of these comments have been of the “Well we would beat you 50-0 too if we cheated.” Or “Matt Barkley might as well stay in school, USC pays him more than the NFL will.” Or “It’s not winning when you cheat.”

For the LAST TIME: USC DID NOT CHEAT

USC did not offer Reggie Bush or his family money to come play at USC.

Boosters of USC did not pay Reggie Bush or his family to stay at USC.

An unscrupulous agent with no ties to USC approached Bush and his family on his own, not at the directive of Coaches, Administration or Boosters.

This is about Reggie’s improper benefits which in no way are tied to USC the actual university.

In fact, read the NCAA report – they could not prove anyone at USC knew about it and fined us largely because “we should have known.”  Of course they let other schools off saying “they didn’t know, “ but this is not a rant about the wild inconsistencies of the NCAA.

This is about certain UCLA*, ASU, Washington, Arizona, Utah, Colorado, Stanford, Cal, Oregon, Oregon State, Washington State, Syracuse, NOTRE DAME *, and Minnesota fans who’ve lobbed the “CHEATERS” label at us so many times in the past two seasons it is ridiculous.

And frankly I am sick of it. None of you have any idea what the NCAA case against USC’s football program (which was really ALL about Reggie Bush) is really all about.

So, because of actions happening 130+ miles away in San Diego associated with a player long since departed for the NFL, USC had/was given:

• 1 BCS Title Taken Away
• 1 Heisman Trophy Taken Away
• 2 year post-season ban
• 4 years probation
• 30 lost scholarships

Meanwhile, the kids playing for USC now were in ELEMENTARY school when Reggie Bush and his family were breaking the rules. REGGIE BROKE THE RULES, not the USC football program. However, under NCAA lore, it is the school and innocent kids that pay, not the offender. This is in no way fair, nor is it a deterrent, since the offenders are never reprimanded, fined, or sanctioned themselves in any way.

So Reggie had to give his Heisman back, big deal. Matt Barkley, T.J. McDonald, Matt Kalil, Nick Perry, Robert Woods, et al have played for two seasons, become bowl eligible for two seasons, WON THE PAC-12 SOUTH and been denied the opportunity to play in the Championship game because of something Reggie Bush did when they were in 5th grade.

Tell me how this is fair. I dare you to. Also, tell me how this is CHEATING by the USC football program. I’d like to see how anyone can possibly call what happened “USC Cheating.”

My friend and fellow Trojan Zack Jerome over at the hilariously arrogant Lost Angeles Blog sums it up brilliantly in this Xtra Normal video,  so go give it a watch, be enlightened and STFU because USC will always be better than you. That’s what makes USC, well, USC. I’m sorry you don’t get it, you’re not a Trojan.

Bruin Tries to Explain Sanctions to USC Fan

* Especially those damn bRuins and Domers

USC 50.

UCLA 0.

It was glorious. Better than any die hard Trojan could ever have hoped for. The hapless Bruins of UCLA walked into the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum wearing “special” all white uniforms that signaled their immediate surrender. The Trojans looked, well, looked like USC. Specifically like 2002 USC, Pete Carroll’s 2nd year when Carson Palmer and Mike Williams and Justin Fargus ran all over competitors in November. Only this time it’s Matt Barkley and Robert Woods/Marquise Lee and Curtis McNeal.

It was amazing.

Obviously, it sparked the first post in eons here.

Football fiends, I am at a crossroads with this site. Gridiron Goddess is not going away, or going anywhere, I am just re-evaluating.

I am disillusioned with the game I love so much. I am not making any money with this site at a time when I need to focus 100% of my writing efforts on projects that are making me money.

There will be a state of the Gridiron Goddess post soon, as soon as I figure out what I am doing. I will also be back to talk USC’s season, recap it, look to the future and prognosticate on both Matt Barkley’s Heisman chances and whether or not he will declare for the draft or come back to cement his immortality at USC.

In short, I think this is going to become either a strictly USC blog with occasional posts about other teams or a Pac-12 and NFL blog. I am figuring it out.

In the meantime, I will be savoring the amazing 50-0 Trojan domination of fUCLA’s bRuins.

Remember folks, don’t bRuin your life!

Fight On!

by Amy Lamare

So USC at ASU.  Yeah, the thing is, basically Burfict scares the crap out of me. USC’s O-line is both woefully inexperienced and plagued with injuries. With no consistency in personnel, they haven’t found their stride yet. Which leaves Matt Barkley open to the wrath of Vontaze.

Yeah, that’s pretty much my take on the game. Can SC win? OF COURSE.  Is this the toughest team we’ve faced so far this season? Absolutely.

But, and this is a significant but, there is always the very good chance that ASU will “ASU” itself. You know what I mean. This team is never lacking talent, but year in and year out, the Sun Devils find a way to beat themselves. Stupid mistakes, penalties, lack of discipline – it’s a combination of all those things.

The Sun Devil team that beat a (then) ranked Missouri team was a great team.

The one that lost to Illinois, “ASU’d” themselves.

Consider also, that USC has defeated Arizona State 11 consecutive times. In fact, they are the only Pac-10/Pac-12 team in the era of USC domination to never beat the Trojans.  ASU Coach Dennis Erickson is 1-8 versus the Trojans.  Erickson’s streak extends through his tenure at ASU, Oregon State, and Washington State. That one win was in 2000 when Erickson was in Corvallis, and that win broke a Pac-10 record 26-game losing streak against Troy.

The last time ASU beat USC was in 1999 at the Coliseum. If you remember (and I know you do), the 90s were not a bright spot in Trojan history.

USC comes into Tempe as a 2.5 point underdog. I like this position. As we know, USC doesn’t necessarily do well when they are expected to win big. (See: Stanford 2007)

Tomorrow the Trojans can extend their Sun Devil domination to 12 consecutive games.

They just have to stop Brock “6’8” Oswelier and his receiving corps and contain the fury known as Vontaze Burfict.

Sure, no problem. After all We. Are. SC.

by Amy Lamare, Gridiron Goddess, head Cheese around these parts.

Last week USC faced off against Minnesota on a blazing hot day at the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum.  It was supposed to be a cake walk for these “much improved’ Trojans. And it was, for two quarters.  The second half, as you all know by now, was not pretty for Troy.  And neither were those two point conversion attempts. Nor Lane Kiffin’s failure to make significant adjustments in the second half, making the Trojans dependent on a late interception to preserve the win. USC 19, Minnesota 17

On the bright side, if USC can win games with the Matt Barkley to Robert Woods play alone, the offense doesn’t look bad. Seriously. Was Jeremy Bates calling this game? It seemed every single call was Barkley to Woods.  In fact, both the QB and the WR set USC records last Saturday afternoon. Woods caught a school-record 17 passes for 177 yards and three touchdowns, breaking a record formerly held by Trojan Great Johnnie Morton.

Most Receptions in a  Single Game – USC All-Time

Heather is back with a handy dandy guide to tailgating… yeah, that’s it, tailgating!

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When I was in college, my university was one of only three schools
that served beer at collegiate sporting events. You know what that
means, people? That means you could use your meal plan dollars TO BUY
BEER AT SPORTING EVENTS! Not that I ever did that. But I know plenty
of people who did.

Four years after I graduated, the president of the university decided
he didn’t like all the income generated from alcohol sales. Or maybe
he didn’t like all the drunks at sporting events. I dunno, one of the
two. He also raised the price of non-alcoholic beverages. I figured
something out about myself after the first dry football game: I don’t
like football as much when I can’t drink beer. I also realized I
needed another student loan to pay for all the soda I had to drink
once my tailgate buzz started to wear off. Clearly, something had to
be done.

And then, divine inspiration hit. BRING IN MY OWN BEER AND SODA. But
not in a bag or purse, that’s not allowed. No, I had to get creative.

See me up there? I look like your typical football fan. But I have
eight cans and one airplane-size bottle on my person – just like every
football game I’ve gone to for the last three years. Pull up a chair,
grasshopper. I’m going to teach you how.

Hiding Place #1 – Socks
Yield: Two Cans
Skill Level – Beginner
Make sure you have stretchy socks, but NOT loose socks. Otherwise, you
could lose your precious cargo as you walk into the stadium.

When your pants are rolled down, you can hardly tell anything is there.

Hiding Place #2 – Small of Back
Yield – One to Two Cans
Skill Level – Beginner
Anyone can do this, but having a sweatshirt tied around your waist can
only help.

Hiding Place #3 – Bra
Yield – One Can
Skill Level – Intermediate
This really works better with a proper bra – especially if it’s
padded. But a picture of that would be like porn, so use your
imagination.

Hiding Place #4 – Hat
Yield – One Airplane Bottle
Skill Level – Intermediate
You have to be blessed with a small head, or own an over sized beanie
to make this work.

Hiding Place #5 – Hoodie
Yield – Four to Five Cans
Skill Level – Advanced
This method has two hiding places. Obviously, a hooded sweatshirt is
required for this. You’ll have to tie your sweatshirt securely around
your waist with the hood on the inside and the pouch facing in. It is
imperative your hood have a string. You’ll want to stick cans in the
hood, then tie the string tightly. The amount of cans you can fit in
the hood is dependent on that string.

The second place you can hide cans is in the pouch. DON’T GET GREEDY!
Nothing is securing the cans in the pouch, which is why this has such
a high difficulty level.

Yeah, I’m cheap, but I have $120,000 in student loans to pay off!

As college football 2011 is on the literal VERGE of kicking off, I thought it would be fun to revisit what I think is one of the funniest posts of all time: My awesome friend Heather’s documented feud with Lee Corso a/k/a The Enemy of Fun, whereas WE we are FRIENDS OF FUN and, as you can see, freakishly devoted Trojan fans.

——————————————————————————

You guys, my friend Heather is one of the most hilarious human beings you will ever encounter. Her sense of humor is wicked and quick and smart and so very awesome. Besides being a fellow die-hard Trojan fan, she is also a beloved sorority sister of mine. Check out Heather’s adventures raising her beautiful daughters at The Spohrs Are Multiplying.

This post is classic Heather, and originally ran on her site on September 15, 2008.

Corso vs Spohr

by Heather Spohr

Everyone needs an enemy, right? Some people are enemies with a neighbor, others with a boss or former classmate. My enemy? Lee Corso.

He wasn’t always my enemy. In fact, I used to find him charming and somewhat hilarious, acting like a crazy college kid even though he’s over 70 years old. We are big college football fans around these parts, so I watch him religiously every week.

It all started back in 2005, when the College GameDay crew came to the LA Memorial Coliseum for #11 UCLA vs. #1 USC . For those of you who don’t watch College GameDay, it’s filmed at a different college football town every week. The filming is open to all students and fans of either team. Pretty much everyone in attendance is die-hard for their chosen team, and many people bring signs to be seen on TV. I wanted to proclaim my ultimate fan status toward Corso. He is so enthusiastic and a little nutty, just like me. Clearly, we’re cut from the same cloth. I wracked my brain for a week, trying to think of a way to get his attention. And then it struck me the same way lightening struck Corso’s rental car:

This sign was on the broadcast several times (I didn’t have a DVR in 2005 so you’ll have to take my word for it). About 70 minutes into the show, a P.A. in sweat pants came over to me and said, “You’re going to have to take your sign down. It’s obscene. Corso doesn’t like it.” I said, “Obscene? What part of it is obscene? Wait…Corso saw my sign?! YAY!” My friend Chris (the one in the picture) then said, “There’s nothing bad written on this sign! It’s just implied. There is TOTALLY a difference.” The P.A. ran off, and we celebrated our victory. Until the P.A. came back with USC campus security. They tried to get me to hand them my sign. At this point, the crowd was egging me on. I refused to give them my sign, saying, “this isn’t the USC campus. You can’t confiscate my sign! It’s MY property! I’m not a student! You don’t have any jurisdiction over me!!!”

Then they got the L.A.P.D. The officers said something about discussing what my sign said down at the station. I gave them my sign. But my love for Corso? Destroyed. He was now Heather Enemy #1. Why didn’t he love me back?

The next year, Lee picked Cal to destroy USC in their meet up in Berkeley. Instead, USC dismantled Cal. The following week, the GameDay crew was at the Coliseum for #2 USC vs #6 Notre Dame. I made this sign, mocking Corso’s erroneous choice:

He didn’t have time to have me or my sign removed from the broadcast area – not that he had grounds for it – because as soon as my sign was on TV I got out of there.

In 2007, I was on bed rest during the entire football season, and I bet Corso breathed a sigh of relief. But this year, I am not on bed rest!! This past weekend, GameDay was once again at the Coliseum, this time for #5 Ohio State’s visit. For the weeks leading up to the game, everyone asked me what my sign would say. I knew I would have at least one sign – this one:

Even Flat Jackie! made an appearance!

It took me a while to think about my other sign. My tailgating crew and I wracked our tired brains, and then I decided to blame Corso for a crime I’d been the victim of nine years ago:

What? Can you prove he didn’t steal my bike? That’s what I thought.

My friends Brianne, Derek, Jack, Jeff, and Erin went over to the GameDay set, and we went for our usual spot behind Chris Fowler. When we got there we found a bunch of rowdy painted fraternity guys, so we knew we’d get on camera. And sure enough…

Another one of our signs (referencing the USC Quarterback’s slightly vulgar nickname) managed to make it on camera before it, too, was banned. Luckily my friend Derek was much more charming to the P.A., and he wasn’t threatened with legal action. Or maybe it was because Corso wasn’t afraid of his love. I prefer to think it’s the latter. If I know Corso (and I think I do), he’s already worried about the next sign I’ll greet him with.

When she is not stalking Lee Corso via College Game Day, Heather Spohr chronicles the adventures of raising her children  at her very popular website The Spohrs Are Multiplying.

by uscsyco

College football sucks. There. I said it. It’s been destroyed by the NCAA which kind of exists to make sure that college sports don’t suck. But the NCAA screwed the pooch and killed the game.

I remember when people asked me why I liked college football so much more than NFL football. Answer was always that the college version was more pure. It was a bunch of kids playing for love of the game rather than a bunch of greedy malcontents who are just out for themselves in the NFL.

Well times sure have changed, haven’t they? Now college football is full of schools that want to win at all costs and players who want to get paid more than they care about winning and the NCAA is turning a blind eye to it all. Except for USC. No, USC has ONE PLAYER break some rules and USC gets hammered by the NCAA with the strongest sanctions in decades.

But then when a bunch of big time players from Ohio State get caught breaking rules they get to play in their bowl game and get their punishment postponed until the following year. What the hell is that? And then we have Cam Newton’s dad shopping him around to the highest bidder and the NCAA does nothing. And the University of Oregon pays a recruiting service to deliver a player and nothing. And the entire University of Miami football program has gone to hell, committing the worst violations in the history of NCAA violations while under the watch of the very person who hammered USC. And you know what? Everyone is pretty sure Miami’s penalty won’t match the crime. I can go on and on but you get the picture; if you’re reading this you probably already know what I’m talking about.

So now the NCAA’s made it so you can pretty much do whatever the hell you want to do, unless you’re USC, and the NCAA won’t come down on you that hard. And if you don’t like whatever punishment you do get, you can always seek asylum in the NFL and let the next generation of players, coaches and fans pay for your sins. And if you’re an NFL agent you’ve got it made in the shade. You can entice players to break every rule in the book but you have ambassador status and can’t be touched by the NCAA.

Bottom line is that the NCAA has made it so you’re at a competitive disadvantage if you’re not cheating. That’s because the benefit derived from cheating is always greater than the penalty from getting caught. Unless you’re USC. And until that changes they’re enabling people to break the rules.

Yay for college football!

If that isn’t enough to convince you that the NCAA is sucking all the joy out of college football they have a new rule this year that literally sucks the joy out of college football. Starting this year taunting an opposing player can NULLIFY SCORING PLAYS! ARE YOU F’N KIDDING ME??? So if you legitimately score (this isn’t basketball folks, points are hard to come by in this sport) and hurt your opponent’s feelings in the process you lose the points… I can’t wait to see the first time that penalty is called with a game on the line, or in a bowl game, or in overtime. This is probably the first rule in the history of all sports that takes legitimately scored points off the scoreboard because of gloating. Who comes up with this crap?

That’s like telling a kid he’s a virgin again because he got too excited after getting laid for the first time.

The result of this rule is going to be a chilling effect on celebration. What fun is that? The only people who benefit from this are long snappers who will no longer have kickers jumping into their arms like little girls. The old unsportsmanlike conduct rule worked just fine. What’s the point of this rule? Why is the NCAA wasting their time on crap like this? My advice to the NCAA? Stop over-enforcing celebrations and start enforcing serious violations.

Then there’s the NCAA’s butchering of the post season which everyone pretty much agrees sucks. We NEED a playoff. Or we need to get rid of the BCS and go back to the way things used to be. This BCS business is a crock of shit and the NCAA knows it, that’s why the NCAA still doesn’t officially recognize a national champion in college football – not even the winner of the BCS. I bet some of you didn’t realize that the winner of the “BCS title game” is not considered the National Champion by the NCAA. Fact is, the AP is far more credible and effective than the BCS, so why even bother with it? Money. Plain and simple.

You see, if you haven’t figured it out yet, the NCAA cares more about self preservation than it cares about the sport. And the colleges aren’t innocent either; they care more about making money than they care about having a good system. And in the end the only people that really get screwed are the fans.

Are you nodding in agreement? At this point I feel like I’m preaching to the choir. So let’s do something about it!

I hear a lot of people complaining about how bad things have gotten but I haven’t seen a lot of people do anything about it. The thing is, we the fans are in control here. All we have to do is stop watching college football. Yes, I said stop watching college football. That doesn’t mean I’m going to stop going to USC games. I’ll watch USC football but nothing more. And you know what? Thanks to what the NCAA has done I won’t miss it.

What can we accomplish by boycotting college football? A lot! The NCAA is all about trying to bring in as much money as possible; that money primarily comes from one place and it’s television. What do you think will happen when fans are pushed to their breaking point and stop watching in large numbers? The ratings go down, the audience growth disappears and then the NCAA can kiss all that ad revenue goodbye.

Then and ONLY then will the NCAA stop making a mockery out of the sport and get things straightened out. As we know, right now the NCAA isn’t listening to fans and doesn’t seem to care about us.  So we have to make them listen and make them care. Don’t watch college football! Tell your friends not to watch college football. Some people don’t think it will make a difference if they watch or not but this is just like any other boycott, or like recycling, or whatever…  The only time it doesn’t matter is if nobody does it, but as long as some people are doing it you are part of a bigger pool that does matter. And besides, if you’re sick of the NCAA’s bullshit you shouldn’t put up with it anyway!

Fortunately for most of you reading this you are USC fans and USC football is the best thing about college football. We’re like a shiny diamond surrounded in a big pile of dog crap. We’re like the one cute sorority girl at ucla (making a huge assumption that there’s a cute girl at ucla but you get the point).

So if you love USC and/or you’re sick of the NCAA’s crap you should buy one of my new shirts which is pictured below. None of the shirts were signed by Matt Barkley but you can forge his signature and tell people yours was. Proceeds go to supporting the best tailgate on campus which is starting to get very expensive. Buying a shirt accomplishes four things: 1 – Shows your support for USC; 2 – Makes you look very cool; 3 – Expresses your hatred for the NCAA; 4 – Ensures the best tailgate on campus stays that way.

You can buy a shirt right now at www.SycoWear.com or you can buy one at the tailgate, but I don’t have many and I have a feeling they’re going to sell out fast so hurry up and place your order!

You can also make your voice heard by signing the petition to the NCAA to reverse the excessive penalties levied upon USC at USCpetition.org

Football fiends-

A USC friend had the brilliant idea to organize Trojan Nation in light of the allegations against the University of Miami under the watch of Athletic Director Paul Dee. The very same Paul Dee who sat in judgement of USC as head of the NCAA’s Committee on Infractions.

Well, when a program and a man show themselves to be of such low moral turpitude, how can we, as faithful Trojans, not speak out? For years we’ve felt the COI’s treatment of our football program. Now is our chance to send a message to Mark Emmert, President of the NCAA. S

Stand up and be heard.

Sign the petition for Cancellation of USC’s Sanctions and pass it along to everyone you know.